The Human Wang is a Wonderful Thing

I have had a healthy, dare I say robust, interest in sexuality for the sum of my adult life. This is not to say that I lurk in the bushes outside of men's changing rooms or steal peoples underwear. Rather it means that I have read up on the matter, studied it, talked about it, hell I've even taken a class on it. And you know what? It still fascinates me.

So I asked myself, after all these years of sexual research and discovery, is there anything that still puzzles me? Hell yes. There are many things that still puzzle and the more I learn the more I find to puzzle over. But I have to say that there is one thing that stands out among all the rest, one theme in human sexuality that has continued to intrigue me more than any other. That, my friends, is men's insecurity with their wangs.

This conclusion came about not only through my own sex column, but through many books on sex as well as countless hours of MTV's Love Line. The truth was inescapable; men are was too concerned with their penises. I find this sad. not sad in the pathetic way, mind you, but sad never-the-less. The penis is such a wonderful thing and here are all these men feeling bad about theirs! What is there to feel bad about? You can whizz standing up, write your name in the snow, give it funny names, etc. There's no end to the fun!

Men, or course, are not fretting over their adeptness at urination. They are worried that a person they want to sleep with will think that their little buddy is too thin, too short, or worse yet, cute. There is nothing worse you can say about a penis. Cute is for babies, puppy dogs and dolls. Cute is not to be used in reference to the mighty pillar that is a man's genitalia.

Society is mostly to blame. We have been conditioned to believe that the average penis is about ten inches long and thick enough to choke an elephant. Pornography doesn't help either. Well, it helps lots of things actually but not in this particular respect. (Tee hee). What many men fail to realize is that the members being championed in their favorite skin flicks can be, well, scary. Alot of women are actually relieved when a man isn't sporting one of those jumbo franks.

Unfortunately, men are taught that bigger is better. The truth is that women can have a perfectly good orgasm without a guy around, let alone any mondo erection he might be packing. So to the men of the world I say this; you don't need to have a fantastically huge cock. I know it may be difficult to believe, but its true. Further more, it doesn't matter how big your johnson is if you don't know how to use it properly, which is the only thing you have to worry about in the first place! A woman will not care how much meat you've got so long as you can get the job done. The question is not how long, thick or all around hung you are, its whether or not you can keep the ladies coming back for more. I hope that makes you all feel better. Now, go out and get laid.

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